Sorry I’ve been off line for so long.

I could write about my endurance loss while using the Monette B2 at a  rehearsal. After playing through a song one time at church, I lost my chops. I  couldn’t even hit a tuning C. Ended up using extra pressure to get through it  and I jacked up my chops. My teeth even hurt the next day. I wasn’t comfortable  with the performance so I bailed out of playing that Sunday.

I could also mention the fact that I sent my Jupiter 846RL back to WWBW in  favor of my teacher’s Yamaha 731. After a side by side test the Yamaha won hands  down. The construction was better, the blow was more consistent, the sound/tone  was better and the price was lower. To me it was a no brainer.

Unfortunately these topics seem pretty low on the radar right now. After  riding a positive high on this journey for so long, things have started slipping  to the other end of spectrum where I am not happy about my progress or what I’m  doing. I could water over it and pretend that everything is wonderful but that  would not be the truth. If nothing else, I want this site and my journals to be  a living reflection of what I’m going through and doing.

I practice at least 1.5 to 2 hours on weekdays and 3 to 4+ on weekends. It  doesn’t seem like enough time to work on everything that I need to address. I  have found my technical skill on the horn really lacking. Playing fast passages,  articulation, etc… In order to improve that, I have to cut into my jazz time  and that is difficult to do with master classes looming every two weeks. I’m  thinking about taking regular lessons again. I currently visit my teacher once  every two months and I have a feeling that is not enough. If his schedule allows  it, I’d like to meet with him at least twice a month in order to maintain focus  and work on the right things. I would probably see him on the weeks that I do  not have master classes.

Speaking of master classes – I was listening to recordings of my playing and  it was embarrassing. My ideas sounded stupid, my tone was bad, and I played all  the heads wrong. It doesn’t make me feel very good about the November 14th  concert. I’ve decided that I’m NOT going to invite a lot of people to check me  out. I know I’m a perfectionist but I truly do not expect folks to drop $6 to  hear me butcher the head to Tenor Madness.

When I hit spots like this – I begin to question whether I’m wasting my time  or not. Why am I doing this? Do I have delusions of becoming a regular player  around town? A pro? Am I doing this because I love music and there is something  within me that must get out? There are a lot of things I could be doing with my  time after work and on weekends. The question is – will I enjoy it as much?  Probably not.

I could go on but you get the point. I’m just at a low point after what  seemed to be a never ending high. I’m going to send my horn off to Roy Lawler  for some minor fixes and adjustments. That will probably be for 3 or 4 days. In  the mean time I will do basic chop stuff on my Yamaha 2335SM and work on some  new breathing exercises.

If nothing else I will probably play the blues better during this period.  Somebody cue up Stormy Monday Blues…