I finally got to pick up my horn on Wednesday and it was very disheartening. The mouthpiece felt like a foreign object on my lips and I had no wind. Strange enough – my range was the same but I felt like I had no control over my embouchure. The worst thing was endurance. I started with my usual routine of long tones starting on second line g and descending to F#. I usually ascend back up to g but my chops were wiped out and I forced to rest. Because of my lack of air ? low notes were especially difficult. After 15 minutes rest I finished that process and managed to get through Caruso’s 6 notes – barely. I followed that up with more rest and some slurs from Schlossberg. Everything seemed so out of focus. After a 30 minute break I played a few etudes and called it a day. My chops felt like mush but it felt very good to play again. Holding the horn in my hands was very comforting.

The days following were slightly better and Saturday was the most promising. My biggest problem is I don’t feel as focused as I was before the flu hit. I will try and spend some time trying to refocus on what my goals are. Ingrid gave me some great suggestions that I need to work on and I’m anxious to start working with the Creative Beginnings book. After a few more days of trying to strengthen my chops I’m hoping to pick up where I left off. This makes me wonder at how difficult a come back is for players who have had layoffs for years.